In families people end up playing roles, says Annalisa Barbieri. Look at what’s happening beneath the surface
I am close to my younger brother and we speak at least once a week. These exchanges usually include his referring to money problems. He and his wife are in their 40s, on good salaries, have two young children and a mortgage. At the end of each month, cash is unavailable and they have been caught out by repayments and large bills. I have happily bailed them out on a couple of occasions, but worry about their long-term stability.
It seems to me that they need to review their finances, cut back a little on outgoings and put away a small amount each month. I’ve tried to gently suggest this but, understandably, my brother wants sympathy rather than financial advice. If we get on to this subject, he tends to say, “You’ve had it easier than me.” This is true in some ways, and reopens a general feeling that our parents believe me to be a sensible success and my brother a bit careless, despite his steady family life and well-paid job.
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