You judge yourself harshly, says Annalisa Barbieri. Make peace with the past and be a more confident mother
I am the mother of a four-year-old (due to go to school next month) and a 20-month-old, both girls. I am quite anxious and highly strung. I have always set very high standards for myself and had a need for control.
When my first child was born, the first 12 weeks were tough and we became very sleep-deprived. I read all the books and tried everything I could think of to help her sleep. I didn’t want to leave her to cry, but eventually, at seven months, I didn’t feel I could take it any longer. I had started taking antidepressants because I felt low and more anxious than ever. I joined a support group for sleep training and, for about a week, I left her room at bedtime and returned only at 11pm and 3am to feed her. She cried for hours at a time. And I left her.
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