My son’s girlfriend has an eating disorder. What can I do to help him?

He can’t sacrifice himself for his girlfriend, however ill she may get, says Annalisa Barbieri

Our teenage son’s girlfriend, who is also a teenager, has an eating disorder. She will shortly start a programme of intensive daily treatment, over several weeks. She also deals with added stress and suffered a significant bereavement a year ago. She has had therapy support over several years and, according to my son, does not confide in her therapist, preferring to talk to him, which makes him feel needed, from what I understand. She has a big family and a church support system.

Growing up with a younger brother who has special needs, both of our older children were raised to have more compassion for peers who experience disability and other struggles.

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