The writer talks about combatting his fear of the future, anxiety and appreciating life on low-volume
I go out for a run most days, for the getting outside as much as the running. You feel connected to the world a little bit. So many symptoms of panic are the symptoms of running – racing heart, breathlessness. Weirdly, running has always been my calm place. It’s to do with controllable pain, a pain that you know can end by slowing down. There’s a sort of strange joy in that. If you’ve been through mental or physical pain you can’t control, there’s something comforting about knowing you’re in charge of the dial.
Weirdly, as I get older – I’m in my 40s now – I’m getting better about the thought of ageing. Research says people who worry most about getting older are younger. The thing I find hard about being a father is that your children are a measurement of time in front of you. My children are nine and 10 now, and on the cusp of becoming a different type of child.
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