Cosmetic surgeons report a rise in nipple surgery. Perhaps we should have seen this coming
I give nipples three years. Five tops. Even as I write I’m getting that familiar dissonance, like when you repeat a word so many times, “nipple, nipple, nipple,” that it loses all meaning, instead becoming an abstract song that threatens to unravel the concept of language itself. I’m forgetting what they’re for, where they live, why. “Nipples.” Finished. Their decline began on Instagram, where, while breasts are fine, nipples must be blurred out. Which is helpful in a way, in that it clarifies the boundaries of sexiness, like a butcher drawing lines on a cow. Any photos which feature a female nipple are promptly removed, leading to a smoothness of image, an idealisation of the empty chest, treasureless. If you learned about what people looked like from the photos on your phone, you’d be forgiven for thinking they were all hills with no peaks.
Which surely was one of the factors that prompted this, from the Plastic Surgery Group, in their round-up of cosmetic trend predictions for 2017: “We have seen a 30% rise in women requesting a smaller nipple size in the last year.” The new fashionable body look, they say, is “the ultra-toned, shredded athletic type… ” Like a snazzy tie compliments a suit, or a simple up-do sets off your massive diamond necklace, little Smartie-like nipples will make your muscles sing.
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