Trends of the decade that we've had enough of

Whether it’s wellness and healing crystals or the constant sipping of water, there are some fads that we’ve had our fill of. Here are seven whose time is up

Plants: I am as guilty as the next fool for placing all my hopes in a terracotta pot. House plants have become placeholders for our more unwieldy ambitions of love, care and success, their yellowing tendrils manifestations of our inability to just, just be cool. Much as it pains me, the time has come to let plants be plants again. To release them from the agony of being our pets, our parents, our friends, our miscarriages, to remove these layers of expectation and simply allow them to lean towards the light.

Wellness: Enough. Enough now, wellness, you’ve had your fun. We have humoured you for long enough, nodding along as you repeated your made-up words at double-speed, while sniffing a lot in between trips to the loo. Sure, you had your moments. That juice was lovely. And I can’t say I didn’t levitate a little with superiority as I tucked into a bowl of lightly oiled courgetti. Yes, these leggings are fine, and lavender smells nice, and certain crystals sparkle beautifully in a bathroom, but not only have most of your claims been loudly debunked, and the vast sums of cash chucked at your feet by vulnerable women been questioned, along with the ethics of spreading unsubstantiated witchcraft in the guise of medical fact, but people have died following your advice. Died. Read the room.

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