‘No tricks. No mantras. I just want to learn how to do nothing’: my quest to stay still

Rather than filling every spare moment with distractions, could I find a way to be at ease in my own company?

When I gave up alcohol four and a half years ago, I found I had a lot of extra time on my hands. Hours that would otherwise have been spent in the pub, slumped drunk in front of the telly or nursing a hangover were now full of opportunity. In the first six months of sobriety I started a new business, launched a slew of new projects, saw a therapist once a week, a personal trainer twice a week, trained for and completed a half-marathon, read most of the self-improvement shelf in Waterstones and really upped my flossing game.

On reflection, I had simply replaced drinking with other distractions. I burnt out, got better and tried to chill out. But craving distraction remains a problem. These days, I am unable to confront even natural breaks in the working day without preplanned diversions. A walk from one meeting to the next has to be filled with a playlist or podcast. I have had to start keeping my phone in the boot of my car to stop me checking my emails at the lights.

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